Sunday, December 5, 2010
Yesterday I had an orgasm in my mouth as I was eating. No joke. It was so fucking delicious, I was even making moaning sounds hahaha.
It was heavenly. I went to the Whole Foods buffet and I got a tiny bit of everything, most of which I haven't had in MONTHS. Omg it was so good. I used to scarf down my food without actually tasting it but now I savor ever single bite.
I'm such a mess - most of the time I hate food with a passion but it's disconcerting to find that I'm still in love with it all the same.
The only thing was, even though I really had very little food in my takeout box I was SO FULL halfway through. I forced myself to eat another quarter of it (I hate wasting food & money!) but then I did something strange... I chew/spit the last portion :0
That was the first time I've ever done it and it was such a weird experience! I think I was simply too full to eat anymore but I didn't want to save it or throw it out. I don't know why I thought chew/spit would be a good solution but I definitely did *not* enjoy it. Chewed up food is not pretty :p
I've also realized something over the past couple months - I buy food faster than I can consume them before they spoil. I was sad to realize that my raspberries have finally started to rot and thus must be thrown out. It figures, since I bought them almost 3 weeks ago :/
I think I tend to do what I call a "food shopping binge" where I buy huge amounts of wonderful low calorie foods to compensate for the fact that I am, frankly speaking, starving myself. Even though I don't go grocery shopping very often, when I do, I can't stop until I've bought every item on my list (that I add to whenever I discover some new food I'd like to try) which usually means frequenting all three major supermarkets in my area. I can't even tell you how many times I've had my bags break while walking back to my apartment because of the sheer weight of all the food!
Yesterday was my most recent "food shopping binge" and it was my biggest one yet. I even diverged from my list to buy some very strange items (at least for me) - sorbet (1/2 cup - 100 cal), fruit bars (25 cal) and two kinds of fudge bars (90 cal and 100 cal). What on earth possessed me to buy 4 different varieties of these frozen treats?? I was never very fond of any of them even when I ate "normally". Wowww I'm retarded. And to think, my original intention in going to the supermarket was simply to restock on Fiber One Cereal. I have no control over myself!!
On a non-food note: Kaskade was amazing. When I say this I literally mean that *Kaskade himself* was amazing. The highlight of the night was the incredible dj-ing and 4 straight hours of dancing in which I hope I burned a ton of calories. Otherwise, I sincerely wanted to injure pretty much everyone I came across. Long story short - the club was filled WAY over capacity and having hundreds of people crammed in one room does NOT bode well. I had my feet stomped on several times (thank goodness I was wearing boots although it didn't help much when an overweight woman in heels kindly decided that she wished to stop all feeling in my toes), was shoved every which way, had drinks spilled on me numerous times (by the end i was sticky from my head to my back to my legs) and was followed throughout the night by various creepers of all color and age.
But you know what? It was all worth it when I got back to my apartment at 4 AM to find that my weight was 99.6 lbs.
It is now 10:30 AM and I've completed a full 24 hour fast from my one meal yesterday and I weigh 99.2 lbs. I've beaten my low weight and have less than a pound to go to my next goal weight :)
Honestly though, I'm scared that everything seems to be going too well to be true. I just think that it's pathetic of me to need an entire 4 weeks to be more or less solidly in the 90's. I need to be in the 98's tomorrow...
I couldn't count calories yesterday but it must not have been a lot if I was able to lose this much in one day. Today I'm planning on doing the exact same thing - 500 calories max and another 24 hour fast. Here's what I've planned out:
-1 small tomato (16 cal)
-16 medium asparagus (64 cal)
-0.25 bunch broccoli (52 cal)
-1 Skinny Cow Fudge Bar (100 cal)
-1/2 365 Organic Spinach Florentine Ravioli (230 cal <--another unplanned item!)
-0.75 cup Columbia River Organic Green Beans (30 cal)
-2 tablespoons 365 Salsa Hot (5 cal)
Total: 497 calories
I keep expecting to look drastically different when I hit the 90's but I still look as lumpy as always. Actually, the only thing I've noticed is that I can almost slide my finger between my thighs without it touching either side. I can't wait for the gap to get bigger :)
I stayed up after the club so I could do my weigh-in (I didn't want to miss the timing!) and thus have not slept for about a day and a half now. I am off to bed (yes, in the middle of the day) and do not expect to be up until it is dark.
I go to bed wishing every one of you the very best.
Posted by not.quite.ana at 10:19 AM